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April 30, 2008

I'm gonna be fiddling with my stupid Oprah book forever. The latest thing I'm calling it is Oprah's Dead Son, but it's still not anywhere near done and I've gotta get it done in order to go back and get it done right. I think I started it in 2002. That might have been a while ago. Here's an e-mail I just got:

Subject: remove me from your spam list You're on your own list and I don't do spam. G. Mr. Jones. I received the e-mail below unsolicited from you this morning. I do not know you nor I have I done business with you. I have requested not to receive any more emails from you. Unsolicited commercial emails are spam. I will forward the next one I receive from either of these addresses along with my last two emails to the New York Attorney General's consumer protection division. According to your public profile at the Columbia Journalism School website, you're working on your first book "Fake News, Real Politics." I have a free website listing agents and publishers which may be of assistance to you. I sent an e-mail to the address you provided on the Columbia site, which in and of itself is a tacit solicitation of e-mail communication. Further, my e-mail was in no way "commercial." I'm not selling anything. I gave you a link to a free book, links to chapters of a free audio book, offered to send you a free copy of the fifteen-hour audio book in its entirety and gave you the url of my free website which may aid you in your search for representation and the publication of your first book. The audio book is a narrative nonfiction account of the history of America from 1943 to 2003 which includes pertinent audio clips from noteworthy individuals who helped shape "real news" during those years, from The Shadow, Father Coughlin, Charles Lindbergh, JFK, MLK, Robert Welch, Harry Truman, etc. to Allen Ginsberg, Leadbelly, Walter Chronkite, Charles Bukowski, William Burroughs, Jack Kerouac, etc. (see the free index I provided you for the others). What that all means is that the book I gave you for free and the audio book I offered to send you for free is "news." Your bio says you're a news guy who, as such, should be interested in news. Whose fault is it that you're not what you say you are? Feel free to include this reply in your complaint to the NY Attorney General and/or whomsoever else you may want to complain to. Thanks. G.

Here's the original e-mail I sent the guy.

Quote:

Here's Ginny Good in its entirety:

http://everyonewhosanyone.com/ggsyn1.html

Here are some sample chapters from The Audio Book of Ginny Good.

Chapter 7: North Beach, New Year's Eve, 1962
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch07m.mp3

Chapter 13: San Francisco, Tijuana, Mississippi, New York, Summer, 1964
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch13m.mp3

Chapter 19: La Honda, May, 1965
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch19m.mp3

Chapter 23: Haight-Ashbury, Fall, 1967, Part 1
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch23m.mp3

Chapter 24: Haight-Ashbury, Fall, 1967, Part 2
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch24m.mp3

Chapter 32: Hillsborough, CA, Summer, 1982
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch32m.mp3

Chapter 35: Ashland, OR, February, 2003
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch35m.mp3

Here's the index:
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/ggsyn.html

If you want a copy of the whole huge fifteen-hour extravaganza on .mp3 CDs for free, give me an address and I'll send you a copy. There's a bunch of other stuff on my little website, too. Click some links and see. Thanks. G.

Gerard Jones
everyone@everyonewhosanyone.com
http://www.everyonewhosanyone.com

Unquote.

"...they'll have me whipped for speaking true, thou'lt
have me whipped for lying; and sometimes I am
whipped for holding my peace. I had rather be any
kind o' thing than a fool: and yet I would not be
thee, nuncle..."

Jim Preminger Agency
10866 Wilshire Blvd., 10th Flr.
Los Angeles, CA 90024
(310) 459-6600

http://www.premingeragency.com

Hey, Tom, all fixed. If you want me to send you a copy of the real 357 page book published in 2004, a feature length screenplay and the fifteen hour audio book of GINNY GOOD, let me know. It's the same package I'm gonna be sending to Saul Zaentz, Joe Roth, Bob Shaye, Harvey Weinstein, Sophia Coppola, etc. Thanks. G.

read.
8033 Sunset Blvd., Ste. 937
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 876-2800

I represent feature and television writers and a couple of directors and producers. My clients include John O'Brien, Margaret Oberman, Tom Moore, Heather Morgan, Nick Castle and various other writers working in film and television.

Arthouse Talent & Literary

http://www.arthousetalentandliterary.com

Niad Management
15030 Ventura Blvd., Ste. 19-860
Sherman Oaks, CA 91403
(818) 981-2505

http://www.niadmanagement.com

Jon Klane Agency
120 El Camino Dr., #112
Beverly Hills, CA 90212

http://www.klaneagency.com

***Redacted***

Okay. Are you still at 120 El Camino Dr., #112, Beverly Hills, CA 90212? Thanks. G.

***Redacted***

It's in the mail. Thanks for taking a look. G.

Inscription: Official Signature 9/27/04 "Hey, Jon, if you have any sway with that Samantha Morton chick you seem to mave made a movie with, get her to take a look at the book, too. I think she might find a part for herself. Thanks. G.

The Collective
12200 W. Olympic Blvd., Ste. 490
Los Angeles, CA 90064
(310) 481-0004

Judy Boals, Inc.
307 W. 38th St., Ste. 812
New York, NY 10018
(212) 500-1424

http://www.judyboals.com

Quattro Media
12301 Wilshire Blvd., Ste. 520
Los Angeles, CA 9002
(310) 207-7100

http://www.quattromedia.net

Generate Management
1545 26th St., Ste. 200
Santa Monica, CA 90404
(310) 255-0460

http://www.generatela.com

Hi, Gerald. All of us @ Generate Management love your site, we really do. However, as a new company, we're getting an AWFUL lot of spam and unsolicited queries as a result of having our email addresses printed. Won?t you please remove at least the email addresses, so they are not published for any web spider to crawl over? They are clearly using them for hordes of spam, which we are currently dealing with. We thank you in advance and, again, thank you for the amazing work on the site. Andy

Hey, Andy, glad you like my site but the point of it is that people can be contacted by e-mail...easily. I've got fifteen thousand or so agents, editors, publishers, media and movie guys listed, each of whom would like their e-mail addresses removed. There are services you can get to screen your e-mails...SpamArrest is one I used for awhile. It worked fine but it's pretty easy just to delete spam. That's what I do now, and I get a lot of it. Thanks. G.

With all due respect, we are not authorizing you to publish publicly our email addresses, nor would we ever, had you asked. We do not solicit, nor accept, unsolicited queries. We are not speaking for the 15,000 other companies you have on your website, just our own, which has seen a dramatic increase in nuisance emails and loss of productivity as a result of the time we are spending forced to respond, however limited, to these unsolicited queries. Our company policy expressly forbids the solicitation, and acceptance of, queries, yet we have to legally respond upon receipt. I am sure you can understand our dilemma. Further, Spam filters do not spare us all from receiving these queries and, now, junk Spam from all over the world. A result, again, directly from your choosing to place our addresses on your site, where any search-trained spider program can, and has, found and exploited them. I am asking you again, please, to reconsider publishing our email addresses, immediately, they are causing our company disruption and loss of revenue. Respectfully,

I appreciate your due respect but I don't need your authorization to publish anything and my name isn't "Gerald." You are who you are, you do what you do and your corporate e-mail addresses were readily available on the Internet. If you wanna blame anyone, blame Google or the Bill of Rights...free speech, free press, yadda, yadda, remember? I will gladly put a mark by your name to remind me not to send you any more e-mails if that's what you would like me to do, but I'm not responsible for nor do I have any control over anyone but myself. Sorry about the nuisance e-mails you're getting but I'm not sending them. I'll include the information you've provided about not accepting unsolicited queries. That's the best I can do. Thanks. G.

We are aware that our email addresses were published, briefly; as soon as we realized, however, that the solicitation and Spams were a hazard, we took them down. It has gotten out of control. I am sure we can figure out a solution here; perhaps our info@ domain address would be a happy medium? That way, your users can still send queries (these get routed through the assistants), and the managers are spared the bulf sifting. Let me know your thoughts.

That's fine about the name, I get called all kinds of things, but here's my deal. I've made the best new work of literary art ever made...go listen to all fifteen hours of it and judge for yourself:

http://everyonewhosanyone.com/ggsyn.html

...and it and my other work:

http://everyonewhosanyone.com/other.html

...has been ignored or rejected upwards of 500,000 times by the 15,000 people on my little list so they're staying on my little list as a reminder to future, more enlightened generations, of what morons were running the media and entertainment industries in the early 21st Century. My site which you "love," is an art form unto itself and I'm leaving it the way it is. When people get snitty with me that becomes part of the art:

http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117933780?categoryid=1009&cs=1&s=h&p=0

You've been fine but other entities have gone to great lengths to suppress me and my site as they've suppressed the best new work of literary art and my other stuff. I don't like it and I'm gonna say so. Sorry. G.

Have you Googled me (yet)? I am completely on your side. The hallmark of our company is giving voice to suppressed creative voices. And we would never get between an artist and his work. Never ever ever. WonderShowzen, Janeane Garofalo, Andy Milonakis, those artists are our bread & butter, and we worship the little guy. I wasn't kidding when I said I loved your site; as a writer, I have used it!! It's just those damned Nigerian Spams, Croatian Spams, S. African Spams, literally ten or more a day, that are freaking me out. Anyway, the work beyond this is incredible; beyond OCD, but incredible. But you know you're amazing, why are you fishing for a complement? You really ought to just write a play for OSF about the Little Guy who slew Hollywood.

It takes less than half-a-second to delete ten Nigerian spam e-mails. In the time you've spent talking to me about it you could have deleted ten years of spam. Let's throw the baby out and keep the bath water. Neither you nor I are going to single-handedly eliminate spam. Trust me. And no matter how supportive of "art" you may think you are, you're just not. You can't be. You wouldn't have anything to do with any of your "artists" if they didn't make money. I don't make money. I'm an artist. Those two things are mutually exclusive. That's the way it is and that's the way I like it, hu-huh, uh-huh. Salman Rushdie and Charlie Rose and your buddy Janeane Garofalo think they're not spreading Nazi propaganda and that guys like Jerry Fallwell and Bill O'Reilly are, but the truth is that they all are. You don't make money unless what you have to say is Nazi propaganda. It'll probably take you awhile to understand what I'm talking about due to all the Nazi propaganda you've been spoon-fed since birth, but that doesn't make it any less true. Nobody ever died of a little OCD...and I've got to make more of an impression on Hollywood before a dramatic account of my unfortunate quest is suitable for OSF. I've checked with them. Thanks. G."

I surrender! You are more pure than me! Good luck with your mission!

Oh, I know something I can do that seems to get rid of most of the most egregious spam...I can make a link that says "send e-mail." That way I can click on it when I want to send you an e-mail and spam-bots don't see it as an e-mail address. If you want me to do that, let me know. Thanks. G.

I would be eternally grateful for any effort. And I thank you.

New Wave Entertainment
2660 W. Olive Ave.
Burbank, CA 91505
(818) 295-5000

http://www.nwe.com

The Brandt Company
15159 Greenleaf Street
Sherman Oaks, CA 91403
(818) 783-7747

Ken Lindner and Associates
2049 Century Park East, Ste. 3050
Los Angeles, CA 90067
(310) 277-9223

http://www.kenlindner.com

AKA Talent Agency
6310 San Vicente Blvd #215
Burbank, CA 90048
(323) 965-5600

http://www.akatalent.com

Rabineau Wachter & Sanford
522 Wilshire Blvd.
Santa Monica,CA 90401

The Wallis Agency
210 N. Pass Ave., Ste 205
Burbank, Ca 91505
(818) 953-4848

http://www.wallisagency.com

Oh! So YOU're the culprit. Unless you can correct the information you have on The Wallis Agency, please remove us from the list. I have been bombarded for two solid months by _writers_ looking for _literary_ representation. We _only_ represent actors. Not writers, directors, best boys or dog-walkers. Thank you. Kristene Wallis, The Wallis Agency

I'll fix things. Tell your ACTORS (ONLY) to go read Ginny Good, find themselves juicy parts...there's a bunch...and have them get some producer who wants to make a movie worth making for a change to make a movie out of it. Got any recommendations for decent dog-walkers? Thanks. G.

Gee! How nice to know you don't include me among the giggly goons who won't publish you, since, as I told you once before...I ONLY REPRESENT ACTORS. I should not be listed anywhere in your brilliant, esoteric, mind-boggling list and since you are so very, very brilliant, I just feel in my bones that you deleted me already, for which I thank you. That being said, you may now also delete me from your email list. - Kristene Wallis, The Wallis Agency

And as I told you before it's ONLY ACTORS I want to play the various parts in my gorgeous book so naturally I have to include you among the giggly goons who haven't yet told his or her ACTORS to go read the thing, find himself or herself a juicy role, and get some production company to make a movie out of it. The book is already published, why would I want you to publish it? I want you and your ACTORS to get a movie made out of it. Is that so much to ask? Thanks. G.

Michael Siegel & Associates
11532 Thurston Circle
Los Angeles, CA 90049

http://www.msalit.com

Hotchkiss & Associates
611 Broadway, #741
New York, NY 10012

Irene Webb Literary
1112 Montana Ave., Ste. 294
Santa Monica, CA 90403
(310) 394 9024

http://www.irenewebb.com

Scott Stander and Associates
13701 Riverside Drive, Ste. 201
Sherman Oaks, CA 91423
(818) 905-7000

http://www.scottstander.com

The Artists Agency
1180 S Beverly Drive
Los Angeles, CA 90035
(310) 277-7779

Mitchell K. Stubbs & Associates
8675 W. Washington Blvd., Suite 203
Culver City, CA 90232
(310) 838-1200

http://www.mksagency.com

Marc Bass Talent Agency
9171 Wilshire Blvd., Ste. 380
Beverly Hills, CA 90210
(310) 278-1900

http://www.mba-agency.com

Candace Lake Agency
9200 Sunset Blvd., Ste. 820
Los Angeles, CA 90069
(310) 247-2115

Barry Freed Company, Inc.
468 N. Camden, Ste. 201
Beverly Hills, CA 90210

Result Talent Group
3341 1/2 Primera Ave.
Hollywood Hills, CA 90068
(310) 498-5009

http://www.rtgtalent.com

Brant Rose Agency
6671 Sunset Blvd., Ste. 1584-B
Los Angeles, CA 90028

The Bohrman Agency
8899 Beverly Blvd., Ste. 811
Los Angeles, CA 90048
(310) 550-5444

Creative Convergence
11040 Santa Monica Blvd., Suite 200
Los Angeles, California 90025
(310) 954-8480

http://www.creative-convergence.com

International Arts Entertainment
8899 Beverly Blvd., Suite 800
Los Angeles, CA 90048

http://www.internationalartsentertainment.com

Paul Greenstone Entertainment
(310) 413-4538

http://www.paulgreenstone.com

Lynn Pleshette Agency
2700 N. Beachwood Drive
Los Angeles, CA 90068

Marion Rosenberg Office
PO Box 69826
Los Angeles, CA 90069

http://marionrosenberg.com

Baron Entertainment
5757 Wilshire Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90036
(323) 936-7600

http://www.baronentertainment.com

JLA Talent Agency
9151 Sunset Blvd.
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(319) 276-5677

http://www.jlatalent.com

Beverly Hecht Agency
12001 Ventura Pl. #320
Studio City, CA 90048
(818) 505-1192

http://www.beverlyhecht.com

Film Artists Associates
13563 Ventura Boulevard, 2nd Flr.
Sherman Oaks, CA 91423
(818) 386-9669

The Coppage Company
11501 Chandler Boulevard
North Hollywood, CA 91505
(818) 980-8806

Black Talent & Literary Agency
5318 Wilkinson Avenue
Valley Village, CA 91604
(818) 753-5424

Archer King, Ltd.
1650 Broadway, Ste. 407
New York, NY 10019
(212) 765-3103

Blair Silver & Company
P.O. Box 3188
Manhattan Beach, CA 90266
(310) 546-4669

Careyes Entertainment
9000 Sunset Blvd., Ste. 800
Los Angeles, CA 90069
(310) 888-1240

Schiowitz, Connor, Ankrum & Wolf
1680 Vine St., Ste. 1016
Los Angeles CA 90028
(323) 463-8355

The Dangerfield Agency
4063 Radford, Ste. 201-C
Studio City, CA 91604
(818) 766-7717

To Whom It May Concern, I have received a lot of submissions lately from writers seeking representation but I am a talent agent for actors and do not represent writers. Perhaps you could indicate that somehow in your listing. Thanks so much, Sheila Ellis, Agent, The Dangerfield Agency

Hey, Sheila, I include talent agents 'cause an actor or two here and there might want to make a movie out of great literary material for once in his or her life and I've written a bunch:

http://everyonewhosanyone.com/other.html

Nobody knows how things get done in Hollywood, including the people who get them done, but I figure serendipity has a lot to do with it. I've included the information that you rep actors only and not writers. Thanks. G.

Gerard Jones
http://everyonewhosanyone.com/audio/GGch00introm.mp3

Elkins Entertainment
8306 Wilshire Blvd. PMB 3643
Beverly Hills, CA 90211
(323) 932-0400

http://www.elkinsent.com

The Savage Agency
6212 Banner Avenue
Los Angeles, CA 90038
(323) 461-8316

SDB Partners, Inc.
1801 Avenue of the Stars
Los Angeles, CA 90067
(310) 785-0060

http://www.sdbpartners.com

N. S. Bienstock
1740 Broadway
New York, NY 10019
(212) 765-3040

http://www.nsbienstock.com

Rebel Entertainment Partners
5700 Wilshire Blvd., Ste. 456
Beverly Hills, CA 90036
(323) 935-1700

http://www.reptalent.com

Synergy Management
22287 Mulholland Hwy, Ste 204
Calabasas, CA 91302
(818) 703-6707

Hi Gerard, I believe you have our company listed as a management firm for writers. We do not represent writers, only on-camera talent. I have been receiving emails from writers and unfortunately, we are of no use to them. Would you mind adjusting our listing on your site? Thank you!

Hey, Cat, my site's not for writers only but I'll include your note. Have some of your "on-camera" talent listen to the free audio book of Ginny Good, find himself or herself a cool part and get some producer to make a movie out of it. You're welcome to be more specific about what you do and I'll include that description. Thanks.

We rep on-camera talent with a focus on television hosting, broadcasting and experts (i.e. Chefs, Interior Designers, Stylists, etc).

Silver, Massetti & Szatmary Ltd.
8730 W. Sunset Blvd., Ste. 440
West Hollywood, CA 90069
(310) 289-0909

Bicoastal Talent Agency
210 North Pass Ave., Ste. 204
Burbank, CA 91505
(818) 845-0150

http://www.bicoastaltalent.com

Leverage Management
3030 Pennsylvania Ave.
Santa Monica CA 90404
(310) 526-0320

Hi, Neither Loch Powell nor I represent writers. Please note this on your site as it wastes everyone's time. Thank you very much! Sarah Lum

Michael Levy Enterprises
4383 1/2 Allott Ave.
Sherman Oaks, Ca. 91423
(818) 385-0042

http://www.mlevyenterprises.com

SMA Talent and Literary Agency
9899 Santa Monica Boulevard, Ste. 615
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
(310) 203-8787

http://www.smaagency.com

Zanuk Entertainment
2920 West Olive Ave., Ste 214
Burbank, CA 91505
(818) 846-7907

Gallagher Literary Management
8160 Manitoba Street, Ste. 309
Los Angeles, CA 90293
(310) 822-2070

http://www.robgallagher.freeservers.com

Nick Yellen Creative Agency
1501 Broadway, Ste. 2310
New York, NY 10036
(212) 840-5760

Solid Talent
6860 Lexington Avenue
Hollywood, CA 90038
(323) 978-0808

Scott Stander & Associates
13701 Riverside Drive. Ste. 201
Sherman Oaks, CA 91423
(818) 905-7000

http://www.scottstander.com

US Talent Agency
485 S. Robertson Blvd., Suite 7
Beverly Hills, CA 90211
(310) 858-1533

Talent Scout Management
12228 Venice Blvd., Ste. 539
Los Angeles, CA 90066
(310) 281-6213

http://www.atalentscout.com

Write Movies
1484 1/2 South Robertson Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90035
(310) 276-5160

http://www.writemovies.com

Bobby Ball Agency
4342 Lankershim Blvd.
Universal City, CA 91602
(818) 506-8188

http://www.bobbyballagency.com

The Tory Christopher Group
7920 Selma Ave., #12
West Hollywood, CA 90046
(323) 436-0891

http://www.torychristopher.com

(@) = Not a corporate fascist. (Feel free to apply for non-corporate fascist status...simply tell me in fifty words or fewer why you think you're not a corporate fascist.)

(*) = E-mail bounced. Correct information much appreciated. In fact, anyone who knows anything I don't know, let me know.

(!) = E-mail blocked (just mine, not yours), probably 'cause the intended recipient and/or the company by which he or she is owned and operated is an extra brainwashed, super chicken, corporate fascist goon.

(666) = Asked not to be contacted (by me, not by you), very likely because he or she is a happy little slave boy or a happy little slave girl and doesn't want it any other way, uh-huh, uh-huh.

Gerard Jones
everyone@everyonewhosanyone.com