Dear Dipshit: I see my name on your Nazi creative-writing-teacher list, and, yes, I'm inclined to say fuck you, and I'm inclined to say this because you're blowing smoke when you should be doing something more useful with yourself. Jerking off, it strikes me, would be an improvement, provided you are able to jerk off, which, based on the evidence your provide, I doubt you can. Your head, son, is a marvelous thing to take out of your ass. Let your work speak for itself, and consider shutting the fuck up. Mike Magnuson p.s. Shut the fuck up.
Yo! Mikey! It's precisely the giddy, girlish gibberish guys like you churn out that greases the wheels of the all-pervasive Nazi propaganda network. Boys just wanna have fun, right? My work speaks for itself. So does yours. I've got lots of "creative" writing teachers on my little list...it's a term that's not terribly strictly defined. Thanks for your thoughtful words. G.
You're still a dipshit. If you think I'm girly, asshole, guess again. I'm smarter than you, and I definitely can kick your ass. I probably can't suck dick as well as you, though. And if you think I'm greasing some bullshit Nazi propaganda network, good gravy, how fucking lost are you in space? You think publishing that bullshit hippy memoir-slash-pudding-whipping of yours for not much money at a bullshit press qualifies you to rail on American literature? Read some, I'm telling you, and shut the fuck up. Magnuson
That Nazi twats don't know they're Nazi twats is partly what makes 'em such Nazi twats. I'm the best writer alive. You're a silly Nazi twat. G.
Dipshit, I'm a silly twat. And you're the best writer alive? Shit. What searing intellect we have on display at all times! If only the drunks at the corner bar could do so well. Dude, get a restraining order because I'm finding you and kicking the living snot out of you. That's all there is to it. Procure friends; you'll need them. Call me a fucking Nazi: Fuck you. I repeat: Shut the fuck up.
You are a silly twat, yes. Anyone who thinks "literature" is defined by how much money the writer got is a silly twat. Find me, kick whatever you want out of me. What a civilized response. Burned any good books lately? You can't help being a giddy, giggly, silly little girlish Nazi twat, I realize that. All you've been allowed to know is Nazi propaganda 'cause it's the only thing anyone will pay to publish, publicize and promote and what gets "paid for" is the only thing of any value, so of course you're gonna be a knee-jerk Nazi twat. It's not your fault. You're an innocent victim. Most everyone in America gets brainwashed beyond belief from cradle to grave. Oh, well. People have to make a living, right? Go read everything on my little website (including the e-mail exchange we're having right now) and listen to my free, fifteen hour audio book ("the greatest literary achievement of the 21st Century"), then get back to me. Take your time and maybe in the future you'll stop, look and listen for a second or two before you spew your puerile Nazi twaddle like a puerile Nazi thug. I forgot more than you'll ever know before you were born. G.
Dipshit, I'm supposed to be civilized when you're calling everyone in the publishing industry a Nazi? Fuck you. You don't know shit. You haven't learned anything to forget. Magnuson
Everyone in the publishing industry is a Nazi...and the media industry and the entertainment industry and the academic industry, etc. I have proof, documentary evidence, tons of it. Here's the chapter of my beautiful book I'm listening to at the moment. G.
September 8, 2006
Hey, man. I like it. Totalitarian works perfectly! I hereby lower my shields and regard you in good stead. Your fan, Mag
I'm bagging the thing in another day or two 'cause it's gonna be done. Yippee! You're not my only fan but I forget who the other one is. G.
December 9, 2007
Hey, man. I plan on printing copies and dropping them from airplanes over major cities. mag
Yeah, yeah, start a whole new publishing company, Pigeon Shit Press. Wait. It's been done. I sent out 1200 "press releases." One guy told me to take him off my list, some chick told me I was hilarious, and then there was you. G.